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- You place your refrigerator beside your computer.
- Tech support calls YOU for help.
- You start to experience “withdrawal” after not being online for a while.
- Being called a newbie is a major insult to you.
- Your teacher or boss recommends a drug test for the blood shot eyes.
- You get up at 2:00 AM to go to the bathroom and turn the computer on instead.
- You block out disturbing thoughts about your life with soothing thoughts of the Internet.
- It takes you 15 minutes to scroll through your bookmarks from top to bottom.
- When you check your mail and it says “no new messages”, you check again just to make sure.
- You refuse to go to a vacation spot with no electricity and no phone lines.
- You ask your doctor to implant 1 GB in your brain.
- Your wife says communication is important in a marriage so you buy another computer and install a home network so you can chat.