Things computers can do in movies.


In the beginning......
Political User
Probably been posted before, but still funny. :p

Word processors never display a cursor.

You never have to use the space-bar when typing long sentences.

Movie characters never make typing mistakes.

All monitors display inch-high letters.

High-tech computers, such as those used by NASA, the CIA or some such governmental institution, will have easy to understand graphical interfaces.

Those that don't have graphical interfaces will have incredibly powerful text-based command shells that can correctly understand and execute commands typed in plain English.

Note: Command line interfaces will give you access to any information you want by simply typing, "ACCESS THE SECRET FILES" on any near-by keyboard.

You can also infect a computer with a destructive virus by simply typing "UPLOAD VIRUS". (See "Fortress".)

All computers are connected. You can access the information on the villain's desktop computer even if it's turned off.

Powerful computers beep whenever you press a key or the screen changes. Some computers also slow down the output on the screen so that it doesn't go faster than you can read. (Really advanced computers will also emulate the sound of a dot-matrix printer.)

All computer panels operate on thousands of volts and have explosive devices underneath their surface. Malfunctions are indicated by a bright flash of light, a puff of smoke, a shower of sparks and an explosion that causes you to jump backwards.

People typing on a computer can safely turn it off without saving the data.

A hacker is always able to break into the most sensitive computer in the world by guessing the secret password in two tries.

You may bypass "PERMISSION DENIED" message by using the "OVERRIDE" function. (See "Demolition Man".)

Computers only take 2 seconds to boot up instead of the average minutes for desktop PCs and 30 minutes or more for larger systems that can run 24 hours, 365 days a year without a reset.

Complex calculations and loading of huge amounts of data will be accomplished in under three seconds. Movie modems usually appear to transmit data at the speed of two gigabytes per second.

When the power plant/missile site/main computer overheats, all control panels will explode shortly before the entire building will.

If you display a file on the screen and someone deletes the file, it also disappears from the screen (See "Clear and Present Danger").

If a disk contains encrypted files, you are automatically asked for a password when you insert it.

Computers can interface with any other computer regardless of the manufacturer or galaxy where it originated. (See "Independence Day".)

Computer disks will work on any computer has a floppy drive and all software is usable on any platforms.

The more high-tech the equipment, the more buttons it will have (See "Aliens".)

Note: You must be highly trained to operate high-tech computers because the buttons have no labels except for the "SELF-DESTRUCT" button.

Most computers, no matter how small, have reality-defying three-dimensional active animation, photo-realistic graphics capabilities.

Laptops always have amazing real-time video phone capabilities and performance similar to a CRAY Supercomputer.

Whenever a character looks at a monitor, the image is so bright that it projects itself onto their face. (See "Alien" or "2001")

Searches on the internet will always return what you are looking for no matter how vague your keywords are. (See "Mission Impossible", Tom Cruise searches with keywords like "file" and "computer" an 3 results are returned.)

However blurred, out-of-focus a photo may be, imaging technicians can deliver the most hi-resolution image from it (see X-files, CSI, and Raising Sun) - thanks to Alex for this one

When any computer accesses data, regardless of it's location or media type, the data access can be HEARD, and it always sounds like an old Miniscribe hard drive (see Jurassic Park 1 and most other movies w/computers)


OSNN Veteran Addict
Political User
I used to have this little app that would run in the system tray that would cause your computer to make a sound as you moved the mouse, and when you typed it made beeping sounds and other things like that. It was pretty funny :)


OSNN Veteran Addict
reminds me of the eddie izzard bit about hollywood computers. you never see a general screaming at his computer while simply trying to get a paragraph printed out

and theres always a backdoor. they sit down to the computer

> "Please enter password"
types "geoff"

"how did you know" cries the other person. "Well I knew the person who made it was called Geoff Geoffty Geoff, he was born on the first of Geoff Nineteen Geoffty Geoff".
Or how about major mainframe systems that have a graphical interface with cubes and big labels for everything all displayed on a glowing graph. (Jurassic Park)

What about a hacker being so good they can block and access whatever they want through the internet (Superman III, The Core)

Noone owns anything other than a Dell or a Mac in the future.

Computers can even recreate and figure out what an object is from a 2d picture (Bad Boys, Enemy of the State)

Computers have light up buttons for everything.

Computer viruses will either display a skull and crossbones that laugh at you and prevent you from doing anything, or they will have little creatures that eat your screen away.


OSNN Veteran Addict
Ever noticed that when someone is fixing a talking computer at some stage in the process the computer starts singing "Daisy, Daisy, give me your answer do..."

Perris Calderon

Staff member
Political User
I also notice that when a computer task needs to be accomplished in 10 seconds the computer is able to enter an alternate universe for the last five seconds and suspend time until the task is complete

that actually happens..has to do with the alien technolohy we aquired from those crashed space ships we have been backward engineering since the 50's

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Perris Calderon wrote on Electronic Punk's profile.
Ep, glad to see you come back and tidy up...did want to ask a one day favor, I want to enhance my resume , was hoping you could make me administrator for a day, if so, take me right off since I won't be here to do anything, and don't know the slightest about the board, but it would be nice putting "served administrator osnn", if can do, THANKS

Been running around Quora lately, luv it there
Electronic Punk wrote on Perris Calderon's profile.
All good still mate?
Hello, is there anybody in there? Just nod if you can hear me ...
What a long strange trip it's been. =)

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