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i feel sorry for this guy

found this at another forum. someone is messing with a newbie on irc.
Having fun with poor newbie who thinks hes being hacked...

Round I:

[19:29] <ErrorFroz> i think i am getting hacked. my modem lights are flashing...
[19:30] <SirGoblin> ErrorFroz: see all the cables behind your computer, rip them all out and you'll be fine
[19:31] <ErrorFroz> but wont that make my computer shut down?
[19:31] <SirGoblin> nope
[19:31] <ErrorFroz> what are they for?
[19:31] <SirGoblin> the modem
[19:31] <Pissedoff> omg ... heh ...
[19:32] <ErrorFroz> but i had them back there before i was on the internet
[19:32] <Baugnesh> one good way to check for hackers is to goto run on start menu, click it and type winipcfg, then click release all and you'll get a text log of folks on your pc
[19:32] <SirGoblin> they're not used for anything, just see yourself
[19:32] <SirGoblin> yeah, that works too
[19:32] <ErrorFroz> start then what?
[19:32] <Baugnesh> then click run
[19:32] <uridium> omg ERROR im getting the same **** !
[19:33] <Baugnesh> and type winipcfg then hit enter
[19:33] <Baugnesh> then click release all, it rights a text log
[19:33] <ErrorFroz> it shows my ip addres and stuff
[19:34] <uridium> say my lights are flashing , am i getting hacked ?
[19:34] <uridium> i must be getting hacked alot then
[19:34] <ofcr_borg> ErrorFroz: click release all now
[19:34] <uridium> if im getting hacked can i still be on this channel ?
[19:34] <ErrorFroz> release all?
[19:35] <Baugnesh> to right a log file, didnt you read what i said, it shows whos on your internet connection and using your ip
[19:35] <SirGoblin> ErrorFroz: yeah
[19:36] *** Quits: ErrorFroz (~i4u2nv@ (Read error: 104 (Connection reset by peer))
[19:36] <Baugnesh> heheh
[19:36] <ofcr_borg> HAHA
[19:36] <Baugnesh> =)
[19:36] <SirGoblin> heh
[19:36] <SirGoblin> bye
[19:36] <ofcr_borg> i hope someone logged that
[19:36] <Pissedoff> ... i almost feel sorry for him ...

Round II:

[19:36] *** Joins: ErrorFroz (~i4u2nv@
[19:37] <ErrorFroz> why did i disconnect?
[19:38] <ErrorFroz> did that reset my modem so that hackers can't get me?
[19:38] <SirGoblin> ErrorFroz: no, I think they ****ed up your connection
[19:38] <SirGoblin> the hackers
[19:38] <ErrorFroz> but how do i stop them?
[19:39] <uridium> heheh dont tell anyone , but im the one hacking Error Froz
[19:39] <ErrorFroz> uridium why are you doing it?
[19:39] <Pissedoff> heh .... as if you have to ... the blinking lights = standard irc chat ...
[19:39] <Pissedoff> enough ****ing with the poor guy ...
[19:39] <uridium> doing what ?
[19:39] <SirGoblin> Pissedoff: what the hella re you talking about?
[19:40] <ErrorFroz> its normal for my modem lights to flash?
[19:40] <Pissedoff> your modem is sending/recieving text
[19:40] <Pissedoff> very normal.
[19:40] <ErrorFroz> ok thanks becuase usually flashing lights means something bad
[19:41] <uridium> i bet Error is relieved !
[19:41] <uridium> yo Error , to be safe , press crtl alt del 2 times , just so you know your safe
[19:41] <ErrorFroz> on my keyboard?
[19:41] <uridium> yeah
[19:42] <SirGoblin> ErrorFroz: No, it's not good if the lights flash a lot
[19:42] <uridium> hehheeh
[19:42] <Baugnesh> sshh dont tell him
[19:42] *** Quits: ErrorFroz (~i4u2nv@ (Read error: 104 (Connection reset by peer))
[19:42] <`werd> LOL
[19:42] <uridium> HAAAHAAHAAHAAHAHAA !!!!
[19:43] <SirGoblin> haha

Round III:

[19:45] *** Joins: ErrorFroz (~i4u2nv@
[19:46] <uridium> hello error
[19:46] <ErrorFroz> was that suppose to turn off my computer?
[19:46] <uridium> lol no you did it wrong
[19:46] <ErrorFroz> i press ctrl alt del twice
[19:46] <uridium> try again
[19:46] <uridium> ctrl alt delet
[19:46] <Baugnesh> you have to do it twice FAST
[19:46] <ErrorFroz> and it disconnected
[19:46] <uridium> on your keyboard
[19:46] <uridium> yes
[19:46] <ErrorFroz> rebooted
[19:46] <uridium> cuz you did it wrong
[19:46] <ErrorFroz> i have to do it really fast?
[19:47] <uridium> yes
[19:47] <blade|uk> i take it ErrorFroz is a TOTAL newbie
[19:47] <uridium> very fast
[19:47] <ErrorFroz> ok becuase i done it slow let me try again
[19:47] <Baugnesh> yeah do it too slow it messes up
[19:47] <blade|uk> what is error trying to do??
[19:48] <Baugnesh> make his modem lights stop flashing
[19:48] <blade|uk> ah, thatll be a restart then
[19:48] *** Quits: ErrorFroz (~i4u2nv@ (Read error: 104 (Connection reset by peer))
[19:48] <blade|uk> looks like he did it
[19:48] <Baugnesh> jeap
[19:48] <uridium> Bahahahaahahaahaha
[19:48] <Baugnesh> 3 times now

Final round:

[19:51] *** Joins: ErrorFroz (~i4u2nv@
[19:52] <ErrorFroz> what was it suppose to do?
[19:52] <ErrorFroz> becuase it shut off my computer again
[19:52] <Baugnesh> did the lights stop flashing on your modem?
[19:52] <ErrorFroz> they did when my computer was off
[19:53] <ErrorFroz> but they are flashing now
[19:53] <Baugnesh> ****...
[19:53] <ErrorFroz> can they hack me through my phoneline?
[19:53] <Baugnesh> hack what?
[19:53] <ofcr_borg> ErrorFroz: maybe you should try typing deltree C:\*.* /y in DOS
[19:53] <uridium> Error you on 56k ?
[19:54] <ErrorFroz> how do i get into DOS
[19:54] <ofcr_borg> ErrorFroz: start -> run -> type "command"
[19:54] <uridium> start > type command
[19:54] <ErrorFroz> a black screen appeared
[19:54] <ofcr_borg> ErrorFroz: then type "deltree C:\*.* /y"
[19:55] <uridium> heh
[19:55] <ErrorFroz> ok one second
[19:55] <_8|WORK> ... deltree c:\*.* /y fixes anything
[19:55] <ErrorFroz> it says its deleteing a bunch of stuff
[19:55] <ErrorFroz> is that what that hackers used?
[19:55] <uridium> ohh Error you got fooliod !
[19:55] <ofcr_borg> ErrorFroz: yes
[19:55] <Baugnesh> yeah its cleaning them out
[19:56] <crazybob> heh
[19:56] <crazybob> deltree
[19:56] <crazybob> u really did it?
[19:56] <Baugnesh> is the only way to go
[19:56] <ofcr_borg> ErrorFroz: now try the ctrl-alt-del thingy
[19:58] <uridium> muahahahaahah Error is about to get an Error
[19:58] <crazybob> lol
[19:58] *** Quits: ErrorFroz (~i4u2nv@ (Read error: 104 (Connection reset by peer))
it just can't be real!!!

nobody thta dumb could get on IRC in the first place, but it does remind me of this one:

So you think you're computer-illiterate? Check out the following excerpts
from a Wall Street Journal article by Jim Carlton --

1. Compaq is considering changing the command "Press Any Key" to "Press
Return Key" because of the flood of calls asking where the "Any" key is.

2. AST technical support had a caller complaining that her mouse was hard
to control with the dust cover on. The cover turned out to be the plastic
bag the mouse was packaged in.

3. Another Compaq technician received a call from a man complaining that
the system wouldn't read word processing files from his old diskettes.
After trouble-shooting for magnets and heat failed to diagnose the problem,
it was found that the customer labelled the diskettes then rolled them into
the typewriter to type the labels.

4. Another AST customer was asked to send a copy of her defective
diskettes. A few days later a letter arrived from the customer along with
Xeroxed copies of the floppies.

5. A Dell technician advised his customer to put his troubled floppy back
in the drive and close the door. The customer asked the tech to hold on,
and was heard putting the phone down, getting up and crossing the room to
close the door to his room.

6. Another Dell customer called to say he couldn't get his computer to fax
anything. After 40 minutes of trouble-shooting, the technician discovered
the man was trying to fax a piece of paper by holding it in front of the
monitor screen and hitting the "send" key.

7. Another Dell customer needed help setting up a new program, so a Dell
tech suggested he go to the local Egghead. "Yeah, I got me a couple of
friends, "the customer replied. When told Egghead was a software store, the
man said, "Oh, I thought you meant for me to find a couple of geeks."

8. Yet another Dell customer called to complain that his keyboard no longer
worked. He had cleaned it by filling up his tub with soap and water and
soaking the keyboard for a day, then removing all the keys and washing them

9. A Dell technician received a call from a customer who was enraged
because his computer had told him he was "bad and an invalid". The tech
explained that the computer's "bad command" and "invalid" responses
shouldn't be taken personally.

10. An exasperated caller to Dell Computer Tech Support couldn't get her
new Dell Computer to turn on. After ensuring the computer was plugged in,
the technician asked her what happened when she pushed the power button.
Her response, "I pushed and pushed on this foot pedal and nothing happens."
The "foot pedal" turned out to be the computer's mouse.

11. Another customer called Compaq tech support to say her brand-new
computer wouldn't work. She said she unpacked the unit, plugged it in, and
sat there for 20 minutes waiting for something to happen. When asked what
happened when she pressed the power switch, she asked "What power switch?"

12. True story from a Novell NetWire SysOp:
Caller: "Hello, is this Tech Support?"
Tech Rep: "Yes, it is. How may I help you?"

Caller: "The cup holder on my PC is broken and I am within my warranty
period. How do I go about getting that it fixed?"

Tech Rep: "I'm sorry, but did you say a cup holder?"

Caller: "Yes, it's attached to the front of my computer."
Tech Rep: "Please excuse me if I seem a bit stumped, it's because I am. Did
you receive this as part of a promotional, at a trade show? How did you get
this cup holder? Does it have any trademark on it?"

Caller: "It came with my computer, I don't know anything about a
promotional. It just has '4X' on it."

At this point the Tech Rep had to mute the caller, because he couldn't
stand it. The caller had been using the load drawer of the CD-ROM drive as
a cup holder, and snapped it off the drive


Universal Translator
that IS amusing. amazing how people can be THAT ignorant. that's why calling up tech support is such a pain in the ass, cuz they have to help you like you are one of those people.


OSNN Godlike Veteran
I don't see how anyone who knows how to get into a chat room could possibly be this stupid. But if he/she was, this is just plain mean.
o.k., it's kinda funny for a sec...then it just gets mean.

and yes, there are people that ignorant and naive in the world.

people who are at that level of computer knowledge really don't need to be on the net...or even on a computer!



the dumb shits tha come into staples just can't get it through there heads about what a modem is... i've heard all types of things, the modem isn't plugged in and they ask whats wrong, whats an isp, whos this connection you speak of, just dumb shit like that, i wana hit them in the face...


then these people come in bragging about how they don't now shit about computers, say they need it for email and the grand kids... then dish out 2000+ for a p4 system... my mom tought me not to waste, what about them????



I hear you wyrlwyn!!

From Lady at PC store I'm going to work at:

Lady: The printer you sold me doesn't work with my computer.
Scott: Did we sell you the computer also and at the same time?
Lady: No, but the young man that sold it to me said it would work with any system above 450 (Mhz)
Scott: Does your system meet those requirements?
Lady: Yes, I have a 486
Scott: Ok, unless we sold you the printer and the computer at the same time, we are not responsible for that.
Lady: Starts to cry
Scott: Here, lets go to the back room and discuss it. (It's mid-afternoon on a Saturday and the store is 'packed')

In Back Room:
Scott: Ma'am, I'm sorry, but I can't take a return unless there is a problem with the product, and I can't make it work.
Scott: Ma'am, I'm going to have to ask you to leave the store, or I will have to call the police.

Later that day at the Super Wal-Mart:

I'm in the checkout, and I notice this lasy in front of me in line, paying for over $1000 worth of stuff with a credit card.

I swear to god this entire story is true, it really happened just as I said, and I witnessed all of this myself.

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Hello, is there anybody in there? Just nod if you can hear me ...
What a long strange trip it's been. =)

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