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Do we really need telling?

#1
Actual Label Instructions On Consumer Products:
===============================================

1. On a blanket from Taiwan -
NOT TO BE USED AS PROTECTION FROM A TORNADO.

2. On a helmet mounted mirror used by US cyclists -
REMEMBER, OBJECTS IN THE MIRROR ARE ACTUALLY
BEHIND YOU.

3. On a Taiwanese shampoo -
USE REPEATEDLY FOR SEVERE DAMAGE.

4. On the bottle-top of a (UK) flavoured milk drink
AFTER OPENING, KEEP UPRIGHT.

5. On a New Zealand insect spray -
THIS PRODUCT NOT TESTED ON ANIMALS.

6. In a US guide to setting up a new computer -
TO AVOID CONDENSATION FORMING, ALLOW THE BOXES TO
WARM UP TO ROOM TEMPERATURE BEFORE OPENING.
(Sensible, but the instruction was INSIDE the box.)

7. On a Japanese product used to relieve painful
haemorrhoids
LIE DOWN ON BED AND INSERT POSCOOL SLOWLY UP TO
THE PROJECTED PORTION LIKE A SWORD-GUARD INTO ANAL
DUCT. WHILE INSERTING POSCOOL FOR APPROXIMATELY 5
MINUTES, KEEP QUIET.

8. In some countries, on the bottom of Coke bottles
OPEN OTHER END.

9. On a packet of Sunmaid raisins -
WHY NOT TRY TOSSING OVER YOUR FAVOURITE BREAKFAST
CEREAL?

10. On a Sears hairdryer -
DO NOT USE WHILE SLEEPING.

11. On a bag of Fritos -
YOU COULD BE A WINNER! NO PURCHASE NECESSARY.
DETAILS INSIDE.

12. On a bar of Dial soap -
DIRECTIONS - USE LIKE REGULAR SOAP.

13. On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom
of the box)-
DO NOT TURN UPSIDE DOWN.

14. On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding -
PRODUCT WILL BE HOT AFTER HEATING.

15. On a Korean kitchen knife -
WARNING KEEP OUT OF CHILDREN.

16. On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights -
FOR INDOOR OR OUTDOOR USE ONLY.

17. On a Japanese food processor -
NOT TO BE USED FOR THE OTHER USE.

18. On Sainsbury's peanuts -
WARNING - CONTAINS NUTS.

19. On an American Airlines packet of nuts
INSTRUCTIONS - OPEN PACKET, EAT NUTS.

20. On a Swedish chainsaw -
DO NOT ATTEMPT TO STOP CHAIN WITH YOUR
HANDS.

21. On a child's superman costume -
WEARING OF THIS GARMENT DOES NOT ENABLE YOU TO FLY.

22. On some frozen dinners
SERVING SUGGESTION DEFROST.

23. On a hotel provided shower cap in a box
FITS ONE HEAD.

24. On packaging for a Rowenta iron
DO NOT IRON CLOTHES ON BODY.

25. On Boot's "Children's" cough medicine
DO NOT DRIVE CAR OR OPERATE MACHINERY.

26. On Nytol sleep aid
WARNING MAY CAUSE DROWSINESS.
 

Henyman

Secret Goat Fetish
Political User
#4
Originally posted by Erbmaster
Actual Label Instructions On Consumer Products:
13. On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom
of the box)-
DO NOT TURN UPSIDE DOWN.
sh!t i been putting them the wrong way up:huh:
 

Perris Calderon

Moderator
Staff member
Political User
#5
7. On a Japanese product used to relieve painful
haemorrhoids
LIE DOWN ON BED AND INSERT POSCOOL SLOWLY UP TO
THE PROJECTED PORTION LIKE A SWORD-GUARD INTO ANAL
DUCT. WHILE INSERTING POSCOOL FOR APPROXIMATELY 5
MINUTES, fo

KEEP QUIET.

sounds like he has first hand in
 
#6
Originally posted by Erbmaster
9. On a packet of Sunmaid raisins -
WHY NOT TRY TOSSING OVER YOUR FAVOURITE BREAKFAST
CEREAL?
Sounds more like a serving tip than a warning... :confused:

15. On a Korean kitchen knife -
WARNING KEEP OUT OF CHILDREN.
Now that WOULD be a good idea! :D I just love translation errors.

17. On a Japanese food processor -
NOT TO BE USED FOR THE OTHER USE.
Sounds kinky. I can't think of what that could be. *whistle* :eek:

23. On a hotel provided shower cap in a box
FITS ONE HEAD.
One size fits all? Hard to picture two people trying to get into the same cap at the same time... :D

I also like the microwave oven warning text: DO NOT USE FOR DRYING PETS!

(well unless they're dead I suppose... :D)
 
#7
well if i had a product on the market, i'd Idiot proof it too.. maybe you all dont remember, but in 1990's some guy Sued McDonalds because he spilled coffee on him, and the cup didnt have any cautions about heat... yes, it was a stupid reason, but he got millions for it.
 

Perris Calderon

Moderator
Staff member
Political User
#8
Originally posted by dubstar
well if i had a product on the market, i'd Idiot proof it too.. maybe you all dont remember, but in 1990's some guy Sued McDonalds because he spilled coffee on him, and the cup didnt have any cautions about heat... yes, it was a stupid reason, but he got millions for it.
umm no

that's not the way it happened, though with the way the press protechs big business nowadays, I'm not surprised this is the public impression of this case

McDonald's was warned numerous times by the health dept. that their coffee was way over the standard, too hot, (hot enough to cause third degree burns), dangerous, irresponsible, and would lead to problems

the person that was involved absolutely did not want this to lead to a law suit.

it was McDonald's that insisted on the law suit, so that they could continue to serve coffee twenty degrees hotter then the health dept. said was safe...

they refused to handle the hospital bills, (third dgress burns, this coffee was so hot), and just wanted to prove their poin

because they made more money doing it that way.

this award was a punitive damage, and it was reduced to something closer to 100,000, but I forget the actual figure
 

Mubbers

Shoot!
Political User
#10
Originally posted by dealer
umm no
...
it was McDonald's that insisted on the law suit, so that they could continue to serve coffee twenty degrees hotter then the health dept. said was safe...

they refused to handle the hospital bills, (third dgress burns, this coffee was so hot), and just wanted to prove their poin

because they made more money doing it that way.

this award was a punitive damage, and it was reduced to something closer to 100,000, but I forget the actual figure
I'm interested tho' how do/did they make more money by serving the coffee hotter?

Hotter coffee = more energy used. On the scale that MacDonalds makes coffee that could be unecessary gigawatts of power yearly?

You'ld recon a chickensh1t outfit like MickyD's would be more likely to sell cold coffee!

Mubbers
 

Perris Calderon

Moderator
Staff member
Political User
#11
according to the research, people think the coffee tastes better.

in addition, most mcdonalds give free refills in the morning

fewer cups finnished before the customer leaves.

fewer pots brewed, less free coffee given out, less energy, not more energy used

all with the bonus of people thinking the coffee taste better
 

Mubbers

Shoot!
Political User
#12
yes!

That actually makes sense - it's the opposite of beer!

Cold beer tatses better than the same beer warm. However you drink much more cold beer...

<hic!>

Mubbers
 

Henyman

Secret Goat Fetish
Political User
#13
Originally posted by Mubbers
yes!

That actually makes sense - it's the opposite of beer!

Cold beer tatses better than the same beer warm. However you drink much more cold beer...

<hic!>

Mubbers
/me goes 2 research that:p
 
#14
Good job Maccy "D"'s don't seel their ice-cream too cold. They'd be getting sued by millions of people with "Ice-Cream Headaches" - That pain behind ur eyes & nose when you bolt too much cold ice-cream. Bleeeuuuurrgh. Makes me shudder just thinking about it. :eek:

Research this one if ya dare Henyman :happy: :p :D
 

Mubbers

Shoot!
Political User
#16
Originally posted by Erbmaster
Good job Maccy "D"'s don't seel their ice-cream too cold. They'd be getting sued by millions of people with "Ice-Cream Headaches" - That pain behind ur eyes & nose when you bolt too much cold ice-cream. Bleeeuuuurrgh. Makes me shudder just thinking about it. :eek:

Research this one if ya dare Henyman :happy: :p :D
It is bad!

Also soda drinks not too fizzy - can't have it coming out of your nose now can we???


Bleh!

Mubbers
 
#17
Originally posted by Mubbers
It is bad!

Also soda drinks not too fizzy - can't have it coming out of your nose now can we???


Bleh!

Mubbers
lol that's so true. It's that same feeling you get when you get salt water/the sea up yer nose. :eek:

/Notices ur on a Rig. If it's deep sea, you probably know EXACTLY what i'm talkin' about :D ;)
 

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Perris Calderon wrote on Electronic Punk's profile.
Ep, glad to see you come back and tidy up...did want to ask a one day favor, I want to enhance my resume , was hoping you could make me administrator for a day, if so, take me right off since I won't be here to do anything, and don't know the slightest about the board, but it would be nice putting "served administrator osnn", if can do, THANKS

Been running around Quora lately, luv it there https://tinyurl.com/ycpxl
Electronic Punk wrote on Perris Calderon's profile.
All good still mate?
Hello, is there anybody in there? Just nod if you can hear me ...
Xie
What a long strange trip it's been. =)

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