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Computer Geek Quiz

  1. I have moss growing: A) In my garden
    B) In my bathroom
    C) In my kitchen
    D) On my teeth

  2. When I open my mouth at parties, people:

    A) Listen
    B) Ease away slowly
    C) Stuff a live weasel down my throat
  3. I think computers are:

    A) Uninteresting
    B) Interesting
    C) Too damn small for the stuff I want to do
  4. I think sheep are:

    A) Uninteresting
    B) Interesting
    C) Annoyingly far away from where I live
  5. The Usenet Oracle is:

    A) A pack of weenies who think about "Lisa" way too much
    B) Interesting
    C) Not appreciative of the great answers I write; the Priesthood is out to get me
  6. The gender I desire to have sexual relations with is:

    A) Difficult to understand
    B) Impossible to understand
    C) Clearly from a different planet
    D) How should I know? I've only seen pictures
  7. Bill Gates is:

    A) Bill who?
    B) Very wealthy
    C) Head of Microsoft, which produces some widely used products
    D) The Antichrist
  8. In general, people:

    A) Like me
    B) Don't like me
    C) People? What people?
  9. My friends are:

    A) Diverse
    B) People I know from work or school
    C) Wearing the same clothing I am
  10. My dream vacation is:

    A) Tibet
    B) Europe
    C) California
    D) In a room with lots of fluorescent lights and an unlimited supply of coffee
  11. My job prospects are:

    A) Abysmal
    B) Adequate
    C) I'll never be out of work, you hear me? Never!
    D) They pay people to do this?

Score 0 for each A, 1 for each B, 2 for each C, and 3 for each D. 19 or more : Yep. You're a computer geek, all right.
13 - 18 : You're a geek of some stripe or another.
7 - 12 : Probably not a geek, but watch it...
0 - 6 : If you're of the opposite sex, could you leave a note for me in the personals column? Please? Hello?


I was being sarcastic. I don't look geeky/nerdy nor do I wear my shorts over my trackies when I played in goal. I don't wear glassess with a plaster keeping a frame in, nor sweat like it's 100 degrees. I speak with a nice quiet middle English accent not definable from any area of the Holy land (England).

I don't have multiple orgasms when let loose in Maplins or PC world.

But in my heart of hearts there is a Geek, a bit like Geek inside (Pentium inside).

I forgot to add I don't wear glassess.


I know it was a joke. OK why if Scotland is the holy land then why do more Scottish people (Jocks) live in England than in Scotland?

Maybe they all came to England instead of Argentina as Alex Mcleish's tartan army in 78, well our football is better innit.

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Hello, is there anybody in there? Just nod if you can hear me ...
What a long strange trip it's been. =)

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