even more jokes

[Henyman]

Things That Are Difficult to Say When You're Drunk:

Indubitably; Innovative; Preliminary; Proliferation; Cinnamon.

Things That Are VERY Difficult to Say When You're Drunk:

Specificity; Cogito ergo sum; British; Constitution;
Passive-aggressive disorder; Loquacious; Transubstantiate.

Things That Are Downright IMPOSSIBLE to Say When You're Drunk:

Thanks, but I don't want to have sex; Nope, no more booze for
me; Sorry, but you're not really my type; Good evening, officer,
isn't it lovely out tonight? Oh, I just couldn't-no one wants
to hear me sing!

 

[Hipster Doofus]

Henyman.........the writing is on the wall. You're starting to look like this guy>

 

[Henyman]

i better give it up now i guess.....i'll never bother the site with my jokes again

 

[funky dredd]

Your poll isn't looking so swell!

 

[2z]

265 views
27 votes

90% of members couldn't care less

 

[Henyman]

lol true

15 say bugger off
12 say keep em cumin

 

[2z]

its a close call henyman

Still a lot of members like your style of humour

have you got any more jokes ???

good ones that is

 

[Smokie]

Henyman..I feel so..so.. I just can't find the words .. Ok, I found some .. bugger off

Joke mate!!!!

 

[stuy_b]

Now , now smokie, chillout!!

Let Henyman post his jokes, you dont have to read them!!

 

[Henyman]

nah smokie's jus kiddin....or else

A red head, a brunette, and (of course) a blond walks into a bar. The bartender tells them in the bathroom theres a magical mirror that will give you something good if you tell it the truth. If you lie you get sucked in. The girls liked the idea so they all walked into the bathroom. The brunette said "I think i'm the best looking person in this bar" and out popped out her prize. Next the red-head and went up and dsaid "I think I'm the smartest girl in this bar" it was the truth so a prize popped out of the mirror. Next The blond went "I think...." She was sucked into the mirror and never seen again.


There is a blonde in a playground and she had justlost her job so she decided to kidnap a child and ask for a million pounds in return. At the end of school she took a child and took him behind a tree. She wrote a note saying - " I have kidnapped your child and if you want him back you have to put a million pounds under the tree on the left hand side of the playground" She stuck the note on the childs back and told him to go home. The next day as expected there was a million quid under the tree with a note with it. It said - "How could you do this to a fellow blonde???"

 

[2z]

 

[Henyman]

some more:

There were two babies in a womans' womb.One baby asked
the other, if you had one wish, what would you wish for?
The other baby replied, a car. So that I could ride
around all these streets', (meaning the veins and
arteries) The other one said, not I, I wish I had a
gun. To kill that little bald man that keeps coming
in and out of here!


One day a farmer went to a town to buy some animals. He got to the place and said, "Hi, I'd like to buy a rooster". The man said, "Sir we don't call it a rooster here, we call it a cock." So the farmer replied, "Well then I'll take a cock." Then he looked around and thought that if he was going to buy a rooster he'd need a chiken, so he said, "I'll also take a chiken." The man at the store said, "Sir it is called a pullet here!" So the farmer told him he'd buy a pullet. Then the farmer thought that he'd need a donkey to carry everything since he was walking home. He said, "Hey you know what, I'll take a donkey too." The guy at the store said, "Yes sir but it is called an ass!!" So then the guy at the store explained to the farmer that the ass sometimes doesn't wanna walk. He told him that when this happens all he has to do is scratch its butt and it'll start walking again.
On his way home he was walking and suddenly the ass stopped. He pulled and pulled on the lasso but it didn't work. Then the rooster and the chiken started to fall off of the donkey so he grabbed them. After a while he remembered what the clerk told him, but he couldn't put the animals down 'cause he was afraid someone would steal them. He then saw a very attractive young woman walking towards him and when she got closer he asked her, "Hey miss could you hold my cock and pullet while I scratch my ass?"

A guy who had been on a business trip for a couple of weeks comes home to find his son,Jimmy,riding a brand new 18 speed mountain bike.
"Where did you get the money for that bike?"he asked his son."It must've been over $200."
"It's easy Dad."replied Jimmy."I got the money hiking."
"Come on,tell the truth."his dad said.
"I am telling the truth."his son insisted.Every day you were gone,Mom's boss,Mr.Reynolds,would come over to see Mom,give me $20 and tell me to take a hike."

A naked man stands near the door of a popular nightclub wearing only a wooden box in front of himself with a strap from the box around his neck to hold the box in place. The box has a lid with a hinge. The large sign next to the man says: See the snake=$1.oo, Touch the snake=$5.00 a minute, If snake wakes up and spits on you=no charge.