The hunter Bear

Discussion in 'Funny Farm' started by michelldavid, Aug 14, 2003.

  1. michelldavid

    michelldavid Guest

    Skazzy: Please use correct english on the forums as this joke was pointless otherwise... here is my version so people can understand it:

    Tom was excited to try out his new rifle he got for christmas from his wife, he decided that he would hunt some bears in the forest. so he set off to have a fun day of hunting.

    He spotted a baby bear drinking by the water, he aimed at the bear he was just about to shoot it...but he felt a tap on his shoulder, it was a huge bear, the bear said "you have 2 options, you can either die or let me shag you (this is because bears are so corrupt these days) so Tom decides he'd rather take the pain, so a few weeks later he has recovered from the trauma.

    He decides he will go back to the forest and try once more, he enters the forest and see's another baby bear just like the first time, he steadies his aim and holters the trigger and just before he shoots, he feels a tap on his shoulder again, he turn to see who or what it is and its a big grey bear, the bear says "you can either let me shag you or i'll batter you to death" Tom thinks to himself then decides that his life is far more important than dying so he does the same again...

    Although he survived it took him a few months to get over the trauma of the event completely, he once more returns with a very angry mood in mind, he finds the footprints the grey bear left, he followed them and found the bear,

    he aims and shoots the bear dead, thinking of his sweet revenge gets interrupted by another tap on the shoulder, this time its a polar bear, "just admit it Tom, you don't come here to hunt"

    Original:

    Tom was excited with his new rifle, so he goes to hunt bears
    Soon he see a little bear and he shoot was then he feel a little tap over he shoulder and turn around and see a big black bear; the black bear say:
    - You have two options or i hit you to dead or we have sex
    (because the bears today are so degenerated)
    ..So Tom put over he knees

    He feel pain over two weeks finaly recovered swear in vengance

    Tom go back to the forest, he find to the big black bear and shoot, and he feel another tap in the shoulder, and this time he find a big gray bear he step in his right and say:

    - This is a big mistery Tom You have two options or i hit you to dead or we have sex
    ..So Tom think wath hes life is much more valuable and put over he knees again

    Althoug he is a survivor many months spent until I recover completely

    Offensive he go back to the forest again, find the foot prints of the gray bear and then him firing

    Nevertheless, its sweet revenge was dimmed by a new tap in the shoulder. When it turned, it saw a big polar bear fixed polar bear watching it, while it said to him: - Admit , Tom: you do not come here to hunt or yes?.
     
  2. Codasmd

    Codasmd Old School XPeriencer

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    Hmm...I get it...but...there seemed to be something lost in the translation.

    :)
     
  3. SkazzyUK

    SkazzyUK XP-erience Oldie

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    yea err maybe would have been better if it was in good english daaaah
     
  4. daddyo

    daddyo OSNN Addict

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    Dumb joke...I like the fractured english version better. Does a bear really **** in the woods? Only Pope know answer.
     
  5. Krux

    Krux Nissan Powered

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    haha I like the broken english version better just because its so broken its funny (the joke is bad but the english makes it funny)
     
  6. michelldavid

    michelldavid Guest

    Wath???? ok...the translation sucks but the idea was that, and this is a jocke wath i see in spanish, sorry i promese translate better next time dudes!!!
     
  7. SkazzyUK

    SkazzyUK XP-erience Oldie

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    please tell me ure taking the p*** !!!