Kids these days....

Discussion in 'Funny Farm' started by kanal0315, Feb 26, 2006.

  1. kanal0315

    kanal0315 OSNN One Post Wonder

    Messages:
    9
    Some kids these days are so dumb

    Questions and answers selected from tests in Springdale, Arkansas in 2000 to 16 year old students! (Don't laugh too hard - one of these may be the president someday.)

    Q: Name the four seasons. A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.

    Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to
    drink. A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes
    large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.

    Q: How is dew formed? A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes
    them perspire.

    Q: What is a planet? A: A body of earth surrounded by sky.

    Q: What causes the tides in the oceans? A: The tides are a fight
    between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the
    moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature abhors a
    vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.

    Q: In a democratic society, how important are elections? A: Very
    important. Sex can only happen when a male gets a election.

    Q: What are steroids? A: Things for keeping carpets still on the
    stairs.

    Q: What happens to your body as you age? A: When you get old, so do
    your bowels and you get intercontinental.

    Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty? A: He says good-bye
    to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.

    Q; Name a major disease associated with cigarettes. A: Premature death.

    Q: How can you delay milk turning sour? A: Keep it in the cow.

    Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized? (E.g., abdomen.) A:
    The body is consisted into three parts - the brainium, the borax and
    the abdominal cavity. The branium contains the brain, the borax
    contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the
    five bowels, A,E,I,O and U.

    Q: What is the Fibula? A: A small lie

    Q: What does "varicose" mean? A: Nearby.

    Q: What is the most common form of birth control? A: Most people
    prevent contraception by wearing a condominium.

    Q: Give the meaning of the term "Caesarean Section." A: The caesarean
    section is a district in Rome.

    Q: What is a seizure? A: A Roman emperor.

    Q: What is a terminal illness? A: When you are sick at the airport

    Q: Give an example of a fungus. What is a characteristic feature? A:
    Mushrooms. They always grow in damp places and so they look like
    umbrellas.

    Q: What does the word "benign" mean? A: Benign is what you will be
    after you be eight.

    Q: What is a turbine? A: Something an Arab wears on his head.

    Q: What is a Hindu? A: It lays eggs.

    Some more great jokes can be found at http://thefunnyplace.be/jokes.html
     
  2. Son Goku

    Son Goku No lover of dogma

    Well this one

    might come from exposure to politics :D Politicians and sex scandals... To keep this on a humerious note, and out of the hard talk section, the opening scene of Distinguished Gentleman, with Eddie Murphey. Senator Jeff Johnson, in the office late at night with his Congressional staffer. He died from having sex too hard :laugh:

    Then considering what he was doing at the moment of death with that certain someone who was not his wife, the priest was talking about how he died doing what he believed in, and things that would be good for the country. He was working hard at what he did every night, etc... :eek: And yet with all the PR, and the respectable face being put on the event, the movie goer had already seen. :D
     
  3. Admiral Michael

    Admiral Michael Michaelsoft Systems CEO Folding Team

  4. KingKian

    KingKian OSNN Addict

    Messages:
    105
    Location:
    Singapore
    Cute and funny answers :)
     
  5. Slimfady

    Slimfady OSNN Dino Addcit

    Messages:
    41