Brave Man Jokes

Discussion in 'Funny Farm' started by Dark Atheist, Apr 3, 2009.

  1. Dark Atheist

    Dark Atheist Moderator Political User Folding Team

    In The Void
    How do you turn a fox into an elephant?
    Marry It!

    What is the difference between a battery and a woman?

    A battery has a positive side.

    What are the three fastest means of communication?

    1) Television
    2) Telephone
    3) Telawoman

    What should you give a woman who has everything?

    A man to show her how to work it.

    Why is the space between a woman's breasts and her hips called a waist?

    Because you could easily fit another pair of tits in there.

    Why do women fake orgasms ?

    Because they think men care.

    If your wife keeps coming out of the kitchen to nag at you, what have you

    done wrong?

    Made her chain too long

    How many men does it take to open a beer?

    None. It should be opened when she brings it.

    Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?

    Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably
    never be able to support you.

    Why do women have smaller feet than men?

    It's one of those 'evolutionary things' that allows them to stand closer
    to the kitchen sink.

    How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?

    When she starts a sentence with 'A man once told me...'

    How do you fix a woman's watch?

    You don't. There is a clock on the oven.

    Why do men pass gas more than women?

    Because women can't shut up long enough to build up the required

    If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the

    front door, who do you let in first?

    The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.

    What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?

    A woman who won't do what she's told

    I married a Miss Right.

    I just didn't know her first name was Always.

    Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by


    It's called a Wedding Cake.

    Why do men die before their wives?

    They want to.

    Women will never be equal to men..

    until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and
    still think they are sexy.
    Last edited: Apr 3, 2009
  2. tdinc

    tdinc █▄█ ▀█▄ █ Political User

    Sterling Heights, MICHIGAN
    w00t... hah