One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed. Well, the
passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel like it, I
just want you to hold me."
I said "WHAT????!!! What was that?!"
So she says the words that every husband on the planet dreads to
hear..."You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough
for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to my puzzled
look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for
you in the bedroom?"
Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night I went to sleep. The
very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We
went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed dept.
store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very
expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take so I told her we'll
just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I
said lets get a pair for each outfit. We went on to the jewelry department
where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you...she was
so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I
started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet
when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a
loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual
satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation
she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier". I
could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like
it."
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled
WHAT???!!!" I then said, "Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff
for awhile... You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man
enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she
had this look like she was going to kill me I added, "Why can't you just
love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"
Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either.
passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel like it, I
just want you to hold me."
I said "WHAT????!!! What was that?!"
So she says the words that every husband on the planet dreads to
hear..."You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough
for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to my puzzled
look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for
you in the bedroom?"
Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night I went to sleep. The
very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We
went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed dept.
store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very
expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take so I told her we'll
just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I
said lets get a pair for each outfit. We went on to the jewelry department
where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you...she was
so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I
started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet
when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a
loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual
satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation
she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier". I
could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like
it."
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled
WHAT???!!!" I then said, "Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff
for awhile... You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man
enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she
had this look like she was going to kill me I added, "Why can't you just
love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"
Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either.
