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A couple gets married, and the girl's mother lives downstairs.
The girl has never made love to a man before, and on their wedding night, when he takes off his shirt, she goes running downstairs.
"Momma, Momma," she cries. "I can't believe it! He has hair all over his chest! I can't make love to him, it's disgusting!"
The mother says to her, "He's your husband, you do what he wants you to.
Now go back upstairs."

When the girl gets back upstairs, the man takes off his pants. This sends her running back down to her mother,
'Momma, Momma! It's terrible! He has hair all over his legs!"

The mother tells the girl, "Look, he is your husband, you are his wife. You go back upstairs and do what he wants."

The girl goes back upstairs, and the man takes off his shoes and socks.
She looks down and sees that half of one of his feet is missing. She goes crying back down the stairs.

"Momma, Momma! He's only got one and a half feet!"

"You stay here," says the mother. "I'll go upstairs."

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Hello, is there anybody in there? Just nod if you can hear me ...
What a long strange trip it's been. =)

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