I don't recommend this though... It will probably affect your Outlook Express performance. I do what stuy_b suggests myself. That dirty little, ahem, 'fatherless child,' has it's grubhooks in OE real good.
Open Messenger> Tools> Options> 'preferences' tab. Untick the first two options. (see first half of attachment).
Open Outlook Express> Tools> Options> 'general' tab. Untick the fourth item. (see second half of attachment).
Now the only time it should run is when you open Outlook Express... but then only in the background with a little red 'x' on it and it will close out when you close OE.
Ep, glad to see you come back and tidy up...did want to ask a one day favor, I want to enhance my resume , was hoping you could make me administrator for a day, if so, take me right off since I won't be here to do anything, and don't know the slightest about the board, but it would be nice putting "served administrator osnn", if can do, THANKS