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Dead certain.



Mick and Paddy are out in the Irish countryside shooting rabbits.
Suddenly, right in front of his friend Paddy, Mick falls to the ground, throws a quick spasm, then lies perfectly still. He doesn't seem to be breathing; his eyes are rolled back in his head. In fact, he looks pretty well dead!
Quick as a flash, a horrified Paddy whips out his mobile and calls 999.
He gasps breathlessly to the operator... "Mick just fell to the ground right here in front o' me! He's not breathing, he has no heartbeat! I think he's dead! What can I do?"
Well accustomed to this sort of situation, the emergency operator responds with her most soothing tone...
"Okay Paddy, you must try to stay calm. If there's anything can be done, we'll do it. But you will have to keep your cool, and then we can take it one step at a time! Okay now?
"Sure! Sure! Of course, you're right. I'm fine. Just tell me, what must I do?"
"Great! Now first of all, lets make sure he's dead."...The line goes silent, and then a shot is heard.....
Paddy's voice comes back down the network.... "OK! What do I do

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Hello, is there anybody in there? Just nod if you can hear me ...
What a long strange trip it's been. =)

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