You might be a redneck addicted to the world of computers if.......

Discussion in 'Funny Farm' started by Henyman, May 21, 2006.

  1. Henyman

    Henyman Secret Goat Fetish Political User

    You might be a redneck addicted to the world of computers if.......

    * If yer computer stand is made of a stack of old tires or 2 x 8's and cinderblocks.
    * Ya think www. in a url is a logo for a wrestlin' organization.
    * Someone tells ya they're "locked up" and ya ask if they need bail money.
    * Ya've ever been too drunk to chat.
    * Yer screen saver is a confederate flag and plays dixie.
    * Ya think a harddrive is a trip to Uncle Bubba's.
    * Yer mouse keeps knocking over yer spitcan.
    * Ya think a surge supressor is a pill for diarrhea.
    * Ya keep trying to figure out why yer scanner won't pick up police radio calls.
    * Ya think a megabyte is a new sandwich at McDonalds.
    * Ya have to ask someone how to spell LOL.
    * Yer stomach overlaps half of yer keyboard.
    * Ya try to figure out how to get yer empty beer cans into the recyclin' bin.
    * Ya try to turn on yer computer with the remote.
    * Ya try to figure out how yer floppy disk got hard.
    * Ya play frisbee with yer CD Rom's.
    * Ya find yerself on the floor looking into yer "A Drive" yelling 'Give it back! Give it Back'.
    * When birds fly across yer screen an ya reach for yer shotgun.
    * Ya put a mousetrap on yer desk.
    * Yer yards full of ol' computers stacked on cinder blocks.
    * Ya use yer CD-ROM drive as a beer holder.
    * Ya call tech support an ask where ta buy stamps fer yer e-mail.
    * When ya tern yer computer on ya say, "Come OOOOOOON Betsy."
    * Ya think system wizard is a dude in a funny hat.
    * Ya think 64 M RAM is a nu big block engine fer yer pickup.
    * Ya think ICQ is how smert yer computer is.
    * Someone tellz ya yer computer has a bug an ya reach for the can of Raid.
    * Ya think a mouse pad iz where Mighty Mouse and his cousins hang.
    * Ya go buy a surfboard to surf the net.
    * Ya think yer homepage is where ya really live.
    * Ya give derections to a website that include a person, animal, or old barn.
    * Ya think MB stands for "More Beer."
    * Ya wait fer the bluelight special at K-Mart ta buy yer puter.
    * Ya see the word Download, and take the shells out of yer shotgun.
    * Ya think the person that made yer keyboard was dumb cuz the letters aint in order.
    * Ya think pushing the delete key will make yer ol' lady disappear.
    * Ya think CD stands for Cow Dung.
    * Ya think IBM stands for "Idn't Betsy Marvelous."
    * Ya think GIF stands fer "Goodie It's Free."
    * Ya think Mirabilis is a new brand of smokes.
    * Ya see the "shift" key and try ta figure out how ta change gears.
    * Ya put a quilt over yer screen when a make whoopee to yer ol' lady.
    * Ya wonder why yer screen saver ain't wearing a cape like that there superhero on the cartoons.
    * Ya think screen saver is a new flavor o' candy.
    * Ya think Geocities is a place ta buy lil cars.
    * Ya catch yerself tryin' to smell the lil flower on yer ICQ contact list.
    * Ya think the "A drive" is where ya park yer pickup.
    * Ya see the werd "Zip" and know why youz feelin' a draft.
    * Yer puter has a bumper sticker on it.
    * Part of yer puter is held together with duct tape.
    * Ya sees the word "Refresh" and reach into the cooler fer another beer.
    * Yer in a chat room and someone asks where yer from and you reply, "My momma."
    * You sees the word "Website" and start looking for spiders.
    [​IMG]
     
    knightryderrwn likes this.
  2. kcnychief

    kcnychief █▄█ ▀█▄ █ Political User Folding Team

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    Ha - sounds a bit like you Henyman :p
     
  3. Tittles

    Tittles Dabba Dooba Political User

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    Hell yeah!
     
  4. Henyman

    Henyman Secret Goat Fetish Political User

    i thought it was more like Tittles :p
     
  5. omg its nlm

    omg its nlm lvl 17 Hax Folding Team

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    lol good post!