Try this.

Discussion in 'Funny Farm' started by Kirrie2001, Apr 4, 2002.

  1. Kirrie2001

    Kirrie2001 Guest

    This is cute.


    > Read the questions, try to answer---
    > then check your answer by scrolling down!!
    >
    > 1. WHAT DO YOU PUT IN A TOASTER?
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    > ANSWER: BREAD....

    IF YOU SAID "TOAST" THEN GIVE UP NOW AND SAVE YOURSELF THE TROUBLE OF STRAINING OVER THE REST OF THE TEST...
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    > IF YOU SAID "BREAD" THEN PLEASE PROGRESS ON TO QUESTION 2 .
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    > 2. SAY "SILK" 5 TIMES, NOW SPELL "SILK".....
    WHAT DO COWS DRINK?
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    > ANSWER: "WATER"
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    > IF YOU SAID "MILK," THEN MAY I SUGGEST THAT YOU DO NOT TRY THE NEXT QUESTION, AS IT MAY SEEM THAT YOUR
    > BRAIN CELL IS OVER-TAXED -- YOU DESPERATELY NEED A HOLIDAY...
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    IF YOU SAID "WATER" THEN YOU MAY GO ONTO QUESTION 3 .
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    > 3. IF A RED HOUSE IS MADE FROM RED BRICKS, A BLUE HOUSE IS MADE OUT OF BLUE BRICKS, A PINK HOUSE IS
    > MADE OUT OF PINK BRICKS, A BLACK HOUSE IS MADE OUT OF BLACK BRICKS....
    > WHAT IS A GREEN HOUSE MADE OUT OF?
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    > ANSWER: "GLASS"
    IF YOU SAID "GREEN BRICKS" THEN WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU STILL DOING HERE READING THESE QUESTIONS!!!!
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    > IF YOU SAID "GLASS" THEN PLEASE PROGRESS ONTO QUESTION 4 .
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    > 4. 20 YEARS AGO A PLANE WAS FLYING AT 20,000 FT, OVER THE OLD COUNTRYOF GERMANY WHEN 2 OF THE ENGINES FAILED.

    THE PILOT REALIZING THAT THE LAST REMAINING ENGINE WAS FAILING, DECIDED A CRASH LANDING PROCEDURE,
    BUT UNFORTUNATELY THE ENGINE FAILED BEFORE TIME AND THE PLANE CRASHED SMACK >BANG< IN THE MIDDLE OF
    "NO MAN'S LAND", THE LAND BETWEEN EAST GERMANY AND WEST GERMANY, IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BERLIN WALL .....

    WHERE WOULD YOU BURY THE SURVIVORS -- EAST GERMANY,
    > WEST GERMANY, OR IN "NO MAN'S LAND"?
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    > ANSWER: YOU DON'T BURY "SURVIVORS"
    IF YOU SAID ANYTHING OTHER THAN THAT,
    THEN PLEASE NEVER FLY.
    YOU MAY CAUSE MORE DAMAGE SHOULD THE PLANE CRASH!!!
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    > IF YOU ANSWERED THIS ONE CORRECTLY, THEN CARRY ON TO QUESTION 5 .
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    > 5. IF ON A CLOCK THE HOUR HAND MOVES 1/60th OF A DEGREE EVERY MINUTE, THEN HOW MANY DEGREES WILL
    > THE HOUR HAND TRAVEL IN 1 HOUR?
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    > ANSWER: "1 DEGREE"

    IF YOU SAID "360 DEGREES", OR ANYTHING ELSE,
    MAY I CONGRATULATE YOU ON GETTING THIS FAR...
    BUT BE HONEST WITH YOURSELF.....DO YOU THINK YOU CAN HANDLE THE LAST AND FINAL QUESTION?
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    > IF YOU SAID "1 DEGREE"
    THEN PLEASE GO ON TO THE LAST QUESTION.
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    > 6. --WITHOUT USING A CALCULATOR --

    YOU ARE DRIVING A BUS FROM LONDON TO MILFORD HAVEN (WALES)
    IN LONDON 17 PEOPLE GET ON THE BUS,
    IN READING 6 PEOPLE GET OFF, 9 PEOPLE GET ON,
    IN SWINDON 2 PEOPLE GET OFF, 4 PEOPLE GET ON,
    IN CARDIFF 11 PEOPLE GET OFF, 16 PEOPLE GET ON,
    IN SWANSEA 3 PEOPLE GET OFF, 5 PEOPLE GET ON,
    > IN CARMARTHEN, 6 PEOPLE GET OFF, 3 PEOPLE GET ON.

    THE BUS THEN PULLS INTO MILFORD HAVEN BUS DEPOT.....
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    > WHAT WAS THE NAME OF THE BUS DRIVER?
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    > ANSWER: YOU ARE THE DRIVER -- REMEMBER?

    > HOWJA DO????
     
  2. TR!GG3R

    TR!GG3R Guest

    Funny Dude

    i screwed up on silk :confused: but so ...who cares :p
     
  3. Kirrie2001

    Kirrie2001 Guest

    Quote:i screwed up on silk but so ...who cares

    from TR!GG3R.

    Nobody`s perfect TR!GG3R,

    But I`m the nearest you`ll get, :D :D :D
     
  4. Electronic Punk

    Electronic Punk Administrator Staff Member Political User Folding Team

    Messages:
    18,590
    Location:
    Copenhagen, Denmark
    got to the last one :D then fell over.
     
  5. xsivforce

    xsivforce Prodigal Son Folding Team

    Messages:
    8,547
    Location:
    Texas, USA
    Yep, last one got me too. :p
     
  6. brodie

    brodie OSNN Addict

    Messages:
    117
    Location:
    Perth, Australia
    who gives a sh!!! about the bus, I'm still digging holes from the plane crash and drinking silk while sitting under a pile of bloody green bricks.

    boy what abad day am i having!!!!!!!!!!!:( :(
     
  7. Gnu

    Gnu OSNN Addict

    Messages:
    129
    Funny how every person's brain works differently ... I thought the last one was the easiest, yet the one that had me well and truly stumped was "greenhouse".