RIAA Claims Music On Car Radios Meant Only For Original Vehicle Owner

Discussion in 'Funny Farm' started by Bucky Badger, Sep 13, 2004.

  1. Bucky Badger

    Bucky Badger OSNN Addict


    The Recording Industry Association of America announced today it would be expanding its crackdown on copyright infringement by suing family members, hitchhikers and carpoolers.

    Lawyers for the RIAA maintain that the radio in each car was never meant to be listened to by anyone else except the original owner of the vehicle.

    Therefore, any additional passengers who listen to music on the radio in another individual's car are doing so illegally and without the express permission of the copyright holders of the respective songs that are broadcast.

    RIAA attorneys were preparing to go to Federal District courts across the country to have subpoenas issued to every car maker in America in the hopes of forcing them to disclose the names and addresses of all purchasers from the last 20 years.

    "We think this is a no brainer," said an RIAA spokesperson who declined to be identified. "These drivers have been illegally sharing music on their radios and their passengers have been getting a free ride for way too long," he continued.

    Legal representatives for the RIAA also warned that they would especially be targeting the "big fish" like charter bus drivers and RV owners who blatantly turn up the radio volume allowing others to hear.

    In addition, RIAA lawyers said they were hoping to get a court order to exhume the bodies of Scottish physicist James Clerk-Maxwell, who developed the theory of electromagnetic waves and Guglielmo Marconi, who discovered and harnessed wireless radio in order to sue both corpses for unfair business practices.

    - Corey Deitz

    This Article Is Satire
  2. gonaads

    gonaads Beware the G-Man Political User Folding Team

    Oh yeah riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiite. :p

    Satire to the 10th power. :p
  3. Maveric169

    Maveric169 The Voices Talk to Me

    Elkhart, IN
    When I first read the begining, I was like, wow, they RIAA really has gone off the deep end into la..la land!
  4. Son Goku

    Son Goku No lover of dogma

    ROFL, joke though it be, it sounds just like them ;)

    Oh, they've long since gone over the deep end (along with their pet Senator Hollings).

    thx for the laugh :D
  5. dave holbon

    dave holbon Moderator

    London England
    I sometime wonder about these so called attorneys who purport to be working for whatever the institution is that has failed to modernise themselves and is looking for someone to blame/sue for there loss of revenue.

    They will of course fail as they have no jurisdiction in this domain at the end of the day.

    :) :) :)
  6. Son Goku

    Son Goku No lover of dogma

    If a dollar can be had, there are lawyers out there who will try the case. Just look at cases like:

    - Person eats too many hamburgers, becomes rather routund, and then sues McDonalds for their weight gain. I remember after that case was tried, that it was questioned some places on the Internet, whether resturants should be required to moderate customer's waiste lines for them, and have to serve healthy food. As to personal responsibility?

    - Another person sued McDonalds after their child gained weight, after eating too much at McDonalds...

    I've since heard that some states passed laws, disallowing the suing of fast food resturants, if one eats there and then gets fat.

    - A more recent one I heard was someone suing their cable company, because they watched too much television.


    A little more in depth


    And of course, there are lawyers who will try these sorts of cases...
  7. LeeJend

    LeeJend Moderator

    Fort Worth, TX
    I wish peopel wouldn't post stuff ike this it could give the RIAA ideas.