Man Test.

Discussion in 'Funny Farm' started by Kirrie2001, Jun 8, 2002.

  1. Kirrie2001

    Kirrie2001 Guest

    MALE SENSITIVITY TEST
    1. In the company of females, intercourse should be referred to as:
    A. Lovemaking.
    B. Screwing.
    C. Taking the pigskin bus to tuna town.
    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    2. You should make love to a woman for the first time only after you've both shared:
    A. Your views about what you expect from a sexual relationship.
    B. Your blood-test results.
    C. Five tequila slammers.
    ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    3. You time your orgasm so that:
    A. Your partner climaxes first.
    B. You both climax simultaneously.
    C. You don't miss ESPN Sports Center.
    ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    4.Passionate, spontaneous sex on the kitchen floor is:
    A. Healthy, creative love-play.
    B. Not the sort of thing your wife/girlfriend would agree to.
    C. Not the sort of thing your wife/girlfriend needs to ever find out about.
    ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    5. Spending the whole night cuddling a woman you've just had sex with is:
    A. The best part of the experience.
    B. The second best part of the experience.
    C. $100 extra.
    -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    6. Your wife/girlfriend says she's gained five pounds in the last month. You tell her that it is:
    A. Of no influence on your affectionate feelings for her.
    B. Not a problem, she can join your gym.
    C. A conservative estimate.
    -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    7. You think today's sensitive, caring man is:
    A. A myth.
    B. An oxymoron.
    C. A moron.
    -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    8. Foreplay is to sex as:
    A. An appetizer is to entree.
    B. Primer is to paint.
    C. A long line is to an amusement park ride.
    -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    9. Which of the following are you most likely to find yourself saying at the end of a relationship?
    A. "I hope we can still be friends."
    B. "I'm not in right now, please leave a message at the beep."
    C. "Welcome to Dumpsville. Population, YOU."
    -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    10. A woman who is uncomfortable watching you masturbate:
    A. Probably needs a little more time before she can cope with that sort of intimacy.
    B. Is uptight and a waste of time.
    C. Shouldn't have sat next to you on the bus in the first place.

    Evaluating Results:
    If you answered "A" more than 7 times, check your pants to make sure you
    really ARE a man.
    If you answered "B" more than 7 times, You're a little confused.
    If you answered "C" more than 7 times, "YOU DA MAN!




    :confused: ;) :D
     
  2. Electronic Punk

    Electronic Punk Administrator Staff Member Political User Folding Team

    Messages:
    18,590
    Location:
    Copenhagen, Denmark
    1. In the company of females, intercourse should be referred to as:
    A. Lovemaking.
    B. Screwing.
    C. Taking the pigskin bus to tuna town.
    --------------------
    2. You should make love to a woman for the first time only after you've both shared:
    A. Your views about what you expect from a sexual relationship.
    B. Your blood-test results.
    C. Five tequila slammers. (or something)
    --------------------
    3. You time your orgasm so that:
    A. Your partner climaxes first.
    B. You both climax simultaneously. (hahhaha)
    C. You don't miss ESPN Sports Center.
    --------------------
    4.Passionate, spontaneous sex on the kitchen floor is:
    A. Healthy, creative love-play. (Sounds like fun)
    B. Not the sort of thing your wife/girlfriend would agree to.
    C. Not the sort of thing your wife/girlfriend needs to ever find out about.
    --------------------
    5. Spending the whole night cuddling a woman you've just had sex with is:
    A. The best part of the experience.
    B. The second best part of the experience.
    C. $100 extra.
    --------------------
    6. Your wife/girlfriend says she's gained five pounds in the last month. You tell her that it is:
    A. Of no influence on your affectionate feelings for her.
    B. Not a problem, she can join your gym.
    C. A conservative estimate.
    --------------------
    7. You think today's sensitive, caring man is:
    A. A myth.
    B. An oxymoron.
    C. A moron.
    --------------------
    8. Foreplay is to sex as:
    A. An appetizer is to entree.
    B. Primer is to paint.
    C. A long line is to an amusement park ride.
    --------------------
    9. Which of the following are you most likely to find yourself saying at the end of a relationship?
    A. "I hope we can still be friends."
    B. "I'm not in right now, please leave a message at the beep."
    C. "Welcome to Dumpsville. Population, YOU."
    --------------------
    10. A woman who is uncomfortable watching you masturbate:
    A. Probably needs a little more time before she can cope with that sort of intimacy.
    B. Is uptight and a waste of time.
    C. Shouldn't have sat next to you on the bus in the first place.
     
  3. Khayman

    Khayman I'm sorry Hal... Political User Folding Team

    Messages:
    5,518
    Location:
    England
    1. B. Screwing.
    2. B. Your blood-test results.
    3. C. You don't miss ESPN Sports Center.
    4. D. Unheard of :)
    5. C. $100 extra.
    6. B. Not a problem, she can join your gym.
    7. A. A myth.
    8. C. A long line is to an amusement park ride.
    9. B. "I'm not in right now, please leave a message at the beep."
    10. C. Shouldn't have sat next to you on the bus in the first place.


    When I read number 10 I nearly had an aneurysm from laughing