I saw this thread in another forum and thought it would make a good edition here. But please, use some decorum - some of you have already offended my dog, Cat. My first offering (stolen of course)>>>>> An example of a phone call to tech support; Operator: "Welcome to our customer care, my name is Melvin Sitshere. Could I have your "Customer ID?" Customer: (whispering) "How do I change to the windows directory in DOS?" Operator: "Cee-dee-space-windows and press enter. Could I have your "Username and Client ID?" Customer: "How do I display the contents of a directory?" Operator: "Dee-eye-ar-ur. I need your..........." Customer: (still whispering) "How do I delete a file?" Operator: (alarmed): "Wait a minute, wait a minute, don't be hasty. You don't want to go deleting files from the windows directory unless you're sure you know what they are for!" Customer: "I'm not deleting files." Operator: (curious) "Then what in the world are you doing?" Customer: (quieter than ever) "I'm doing a test."