Is your penis getting paid enough?

Discussion in 'Funny Farm' started by ZeroHour, Jul 6, 2004.

  1. ZeroHour

    ZeroHour ho3 ho3 ho3

    Messages:
    1,118
    Location:
    Scotland
    I, the penis
    I, the penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:

    I do physical labor.
    I work at great depths.
    I plunge head first into everything I do.
    I do not get weekends off or public holidays.
    I work in a damp environment.
    I don't get paid overtime.
    I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation.
    I work in high temperatures.
    My work exposes me to contagious diseases.

    ++++++++++++++
    Dear Penis,

    After assessing your request and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the following reasons:

    You do not work 8 hours straight.
    You fall asleep on the job after brief periods of time.
    You do not always follow the orders of the management team.
    You do not stay in your allocated position, and often visit other areas.
    You do not take initiative, you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working.
    You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift.
    You do not always observe necessary safety regulations, such has wearing the correct protective clothing.
    You'll retire before reaching 65.
    You're unable to work double shifts.
    You sometimes leave your allocated position before you have completed the day's work.
    And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and leaving the workplace carrying 2 suspicious looking bags.

    Sincerely
    Management
     
  2. gonaads

    gonaads Beware the G-Man Political User Folding Team

    ROFLOL... Oooh man tooo funny. :p
     
  3. xsivforce

    xsivforce Prodigal Son Folding Team

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    Great one!
     
  4. Bytes Back

    Bytes Back Ex Police Chief

    Messages:
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    Location:
    Kernow
    The Penis replies


    You do not work 8 hours straight.

    No, about 10 mins to 2 hours straight and about 6 hours floopy

    You fall asleep on the job after brief periods of time.

    Only after the age of 40

    You do not always follow the orders of the management team.

    No, But I do take the initiative a lot

    You do not stay in your allocated position, and often visit other areas.

    It was an accident I tell you !!!

    You do not take initiative, you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working.

    Erm no, Indeed some would say I take the initiative to much :p

    You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift.

    guilty

    You do not always observe necessary safety regulations, such has wearing the correct protective clothing.

    And there isn't always the time :eek:

    You'll retire before reaching 65.

    Wrong again, charlie chaplin had children in his 80's

    You're unable to work double shifts.

    Only after 40

    You sometimes leave your allocated position before you have completed the day's work.

    I dont think so

    And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and leaving the workplace carrying 2 suspicious looking bags

    I Need those bags to work !!!

    Now give me that damned pay rise :p :p :D
     
  5. Geffy

    Geffy Moderator Folding Team

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    lmao

    great reply there Bytes
     
  6. delta4s

    delta4s BLACK HAWK ALOFT

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    Bangalore, India
  7. Grandmaster

    Grandmaster Electronica Addict Political User Folding Team

    Messages:
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    Awesome thread...:D
     
  8. leedogg

    leedogg Gojyone kawaiiiiiiii!

    Messages:
    820
    For such audacity he must be beaten mercilessly by his master.
     
  9. Tittles

    Tittles Dabba Dooba Political User

    Messages:
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    Location:
    Muskegon, Michigan
    u should look up the dear penis song :)...google it and it has a lil video for the song
     
  10. gonaads

    gonaads Beware the G-Man Political User Folding Team


    If ya can't get a "rise" by yerself, you are in serious trouble. :p
     
  11. shazzam911

    shazzam911 S=H=A=Z=Z=A=M

    Messages:
    43
    Location:
    VA
    haha lmao nice one zero