If AOL was a City

Discussion in 'Funny Farm' started by ZeroHour, May 13, 2004.

  1. ZeroHour

    ZeroHour ho3 ho3 ho3

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    If AOL was a City

    1. You'd live in a place where no two people had the same name.

    2. You'd only pay $21.95 a month to live there, but half the time you tried to leave your house, the door would be stuck.

    3. Once you got outside, even if you were in a hurry, you'd be assaulted by slimy little door-to-door sales creeps offering you great AOL 14.4 modems for only $399.99.

    4. The commute to work is just a double-click away, but every time you try to leave your driveway, the flow of traffic knocks you back into your yard.

    5. The local post office would tell your mother you're not a known resident.

    6. The local post office won't forward your mail to you when you move.

    7. If you saw a crime and called 911, they'd reply a week later with a form letter saying how you "really are important to us."

    8. Every time you went shopping, you'd be kicked out of the store by a bouncer screaming, "We're Sorry, This Store is Temporarily Unavailable"

    9. Whenever you traveled to other cities, people would see your license tag and laugh at you, behind your back.

    10. You'd occasionally be sent home during your day by another bouncer telling you that the city has performed an illegal operation.

    11. You'd not have any idea who your neighbors are, and most new arrivals would move in at night, stuff everyone's mailbox with garbage, and vacate before sun-up.

    12. The administration would build a huge, state of the art park, and allow the kids to play there free, then suddenly start demanding money.
     
  2. Mainframeguy

    Mainframeguy Debiant by way of Ubuntu Folding Team

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    .... and what about the AOL CD's? They have to feature somehow....
     
  3. ApparitionX

    ApparitionX Sick of it all.

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    well, that'd be kinda like your drivers liscense or identification card, where your activation codes n things would be maybe your SS number or phone number or something like that.
     
  4. ZeroHour

    ZeroHour ho3 ho3 ho3

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    LOL
    Dont u just LOVE AOL :D
     
  5. ming

    ming OSNN Advanced

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    AOL cds would be the grafity and posters on all the walls and windows of every building. :)
     
  6. ApparitionX

    ApparitionX Sick of it all.

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    No, all the graffitti n litter would probly be all the great "extra features" that you get get if u actually install any of their software. :rolleyes:
     
  7. ZeroHour

    ZeroHour ho3 ho3 ho3

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    Plates would be AOL cd's so they could say it was a *feature* of the versitile AOL disc LOL
     
  8. ApparitionX

    ApparitionX Sick of it all.

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    you mean it isn't?...I use em for plates, coasters, frisbees, tartget practice, now that I think about it...is there anything you CAN"T do with all the great features found in the great aol city?
    lmao
     
  9. Henyman

    Henyman Secret Goat Fetish Political User

    surf the net? :p
     
  10. ming

    ming OSNN Advanced

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  11. NerdUprising

    NerdUprising [ Method ]

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    lmao :D
     
  12. ApparitionX

    ApparitionX Sick of it all.

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    oh yeah
    :D
     
  13. tdinc

    tdinc █▄█ ▀█▄ █ Political User

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