Foreign SIGNS in ENGLISH

Discussion in 'Funny Farm' started by ZeroHour, Aug 3, 2004.

  1. ZeroHour

    ZeroHour ho3 ho3 ho3

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    In a Bangkok temple:
    "IT IS FORBIDDEN TO ENTER A WOMAN, EVEN A FOREIGNER, IF DRESSED AS A MAN."

    Cocktail lounge, Norway:
    "LADIES ARE REQUESTED NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN IN THE BAR."

    At a Budapest zoo:
    "PLEASE DO NOT FEED THE ANIMALS. IF YOU HAVE ANY SUITABLE FOOD, GIVE TO THE
    GUARD ON DUTY."

    Dry cleaners, Bangkok:
    "DROP YOUR TROUSERS HERE FOR THE BEST RESULTS."

    In a Nairobi restaurant:
    "CUSTOMERS WHO FIND OUR WAITRESSES RUDE OUGHT TO SEE THE MANAGER."

    On an Athi River highway:
    "TAKE NOTICE: WHEN THIS SIGN IS UNDER WATER, THIS ROAD IS IMPASSABLE."

    On a poster at Kencom:
    "ARE YOU AN ADULT THAT CANNOT READ? IF SO, WE CAN HELP."

    In a City restaurant:
    "OPEN SEVEN DAYS A WEEK AND WEEKENDS."

    A sign seen on an automatic restroom hand dryer:
    "DO NOT ACTIVATE WITH WET HANDS."

    In a cemetery:
    "PERSONS ARE PROHIBITED FROM PICKING FLOWERS FROM ANY BUT THEIR OWN GRAVES."

    On the menu of a Swiss restaurant:
    "OUR WINES LEAVE YOU NOTHING TO HOPE FOR."

    In a Tokyo bar:
    "SPECIAL COCKTAILS FOR THE LADIES WITH NUTS."

    Hotel, Yugoslavia:
    "THE FLATTENING OF UNDERWEAR WITH PLEASURE IS THE JOB OF THE CHAMBERMAID."

    Hotel, Japan:
    "YOU ARE INVITED TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE CHAMBERMAID."

    In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian Orthodox
    monastery-cemetery:
    "YOU ARE WELCOME TO VISIT THE CEMETERY WHERE FAMOUS RUSSIAN AND SOVIET
    COMPOSERS, ARTISTS, AND WRITERS ARE BURIED DAILY EXCEPT THURSDAY."

    A sign posted in Germany's Black Forest:
    "IT IS STRICTLY FORBIDDEN ON OUR BLACK FOREST CAMPING SITE THAT PEOPLE OF
    DIFFERENT SEX, FOR INSTANCE, MEN AND WOMEN, LIVE TOGETHER IN ONE TENT UNLESS
    THEY ARE MARRIED WITH EACH OTHER FOR THIS PURPOSE."

    Hotel, Zurich:
    "BECAUSE OF THE IMPROPRIETY OF ENTERTAINING GUESTS OF THE OPPOSITE SEX IN
    THE BEDROOM, IT IS SUGGESTED THAT THE LOBBY BE USED FOR THIS PURPOSE."

    Advertisement for donkey rides, Thailand:
    "WOULD YOU LIKE TO RIDE ON YOUR OWN ASS?"

    The box of a clockwork toy made in Hong Kong:
    "GUARANTEED TO WORK THROUGHOUT ITS USEFUL LIFE."

    In a Swiss mountain inn:
    "SPECIAL TODAY - NO ICE-CREAM."

    Airline ticket office, Copenhagen:
    "WE TAKE YOUR BAGS AND SEND THEM IN ALL DIRECTIONS."

    A laundry in Rome:
    "LADIES, LEAVE YOUR CLOTHES HERE AND SPEND THE AFTERNOON HAVING A GOOD TIME."
     
  2. rushm001

    rushm001 In the beginning...... Political User

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    As opposed to what?:confused: [​IMG]
     
  3. ZeroHour

    ZeroHour ho3 ho3 ho3

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    hermaphrodites are excluded from the offer ;)
     
    Grandmaster likes this.
  4. Lee

    Lee OSNN Proxy

    Reminds me of some of the signs I see on peoples doors when delivering papers, like 'Please knock hard' On one sign 'don't worry about the dog, it's the wife you need to be scarred of', trespassers will be shot dead', 'welcome as you enter, then f-off and don't come back on the exit as you leave'
     
  5. Jewelzz

    Jewelzz OSNN Godlike Veteran

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    California
    Read that ^^ :p
     
  6. ZeroHour

    ZeroHour ho3 ho3 ho3

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    Location:
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    Rofl :d