Deserted Island

Discussion in 'Funny Farm' started by ZeroHour, Oct 11, 2004.

  1. ZeroHour

    ZeroHour ho3 ho3 ho3

    Messages:
    1,118
    Location:
    Scotland
    There's this young single guy on a cruise ship, having the time
    of his life. On the second day of the cruise, the ship slams into
    an iceberg and begins to sink.

    Passengers around him are screaming, flailing, and drowning but
    our guy manages to grab on to a piece of driftwood and, using
    every last ounce of strength, swims a few miles through the
    shark-infested sea to a remote, deserted island.

    Sprawled on the shore nearly passed out from exhaustion, he turns
    his head and sees a woman lying near him, unconscious, barely
    breathing. She's also managed to wash up on shore from the
    sinking ship. He makes his way to her, and with some mouth-to-
    mouth assistance he manages to get her breathing again. She looks
    up at him, wide-eyed and grateful, "My God, you saved my life!"

    He suddenly realizes the woman is Cindy Crawford!

    Days and weeks go by. Cindy and our guy are living on the island
    together. They've set up a hut, there's fruit on the trees, and
    they're in heaven. Cindy's fallen madly in love with our man, and
    they're making passionate love morning, noon and night.

    Alas, one day she notices he's looking kind of glum. "What's the
    matter, sweetheart?" she asks, "We have a wonderful life
    together, I'm in love with you. Is there something wrong? Is
    there anything I can do?"

    He says, "Actually, Cin, there is. Would you mind, um, putting on
    my shirt?"

    "Uh, sure," she says, "if this will help." He takes off his shirt
    and she puts it on.

    "Now would you put on my pants?" he asks.

    "Sure, honey, if it's really going to make you feel better," she
    says.

    "Um, OK, would you put on my hat now, and draw a little mustache
    on your face?" he asks.

    "Whatever you want, honey," she says, and does.

    Then he says, "Now, would you start walking around the edge of
    the island?"

    She starts walking around the perimeter of the island. He sets
    off in the other direction. They meet up halfway around the
    island a few minutes later. He rushes up to her, grabs her by the
    shoulders, and says,

    "Dude! You'll never believe who I'm banging!"