Bill Gates Vs MG

Discussion in 'Funny Farm' started by Eve, Jun 12, 2002.

  1. Eve

    Eve Guest

    Saw a really funny post about Bill Gates and MG Motors here the other day. I can't remember whether it was in the front page news section or on the forum. Problem is I want to e-mail it to a friend of mine and I can't for the love of god find it. :confused: Anyone have any idea where it went? TIA :D
  2. Hipster Doofus

    Hipster Doofus Good grief Charlie Brown

    Melbourne Australia
    Her ya go:

    Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry
    with the auto industry and stated, "If GM had kept up
    with technology like the computer industry has, we
    would all be driving twenty-five-dollar cars that get
    1,000 miles to the gallon."

    In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued
    a press release stating: If GM had developed
    technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving
    cars with the following characteristics:

    1. For no reason whatsoever your car would crash twice a day.

    2. Every time they repainted the lines on the road you
    would have to buy a new car.

    3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for
    no reason, and you would just accept this, restart,
    and drive on.

    4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left
    turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to
    to restart, in which case you would have to re-install
    the engine.

    5. Only one person at a time could use the car, unless
    you bought "Car98", or "CarNT". However, even then you
    would have to buy more seats.

    6. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the
    sun, reliable, five times as fast, and twice as easy
    to drive, but would only run on 5 percent of the

    7. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning
    lights would be replaced by a single "general car
    default" warning light.

    8. New seats would force everyone to have the same
    size butt.

    9. The airbag system would ask "Are You Sure?" before
    going off.

    10. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car
    would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you
    simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key,
    and grabbed a hold of the radio antenna.

    11. GM would require all car buyers to also purchase a
    deluxe set of Rand McNally road maps, (now a GM
    subsidiary), even though they neither need them nor
    wanted them. Attempting to delete this option would
    immediately cause the car's performance to diminish by
    50 percent or more. Moreover, GM would become a target
    for investigation by the Justice Department.

    12. Every time GM introduced a new model, car buyers
    would have to learn how to drive all over again
    because none of the controls would operate in the same
    manner as the old car.
  3. Eve

    Eve Guest

    Thanks Hipster, couldn't find it anywhere:D